


drinking you down like i wanna drown

by makeashadow_ao3



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: AH/AU, Bonkai, Christmas Fluff, F/M, Fluff, fluffy holiday fic prompts, holiday gooeyness, kai knows what he wants under HIS tree, so christmassy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:50:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21674380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makeashadow_ao3/pseuds/makeashadow_ao3
Summary: “Bon, you’re practically family, but if you’re looking to make it official just so you’ll feel better— I can think of a few ways.”
Relationships: Bonnie Bennett/Malachai "Kai" Parker
Comments: 23
Kudos: 152





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> a response to a request from “fluffy holiday fic prompts”: bk + sudden snowfall
> 
> title from billie eilish’s “bury a friend” bc My Brand™

Bonnie wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to living in Oregon, but the rainy northwest has slowly grown on her. Like, a parasite or cancer, she’s joked, though, Portland does have its charm. It’s close to her grandmother and far from her childhood traumas. The clairvoyant young woman faced more than her fair share of terrors and isn’t sorry to leave her past right where it is. What with her paranoid, superstitious mother, enabling yet distant father, and the reckless friend group from which she eventually grew distant. 

Some things even she can’t run from. Like, now. She jogs in the misty rain through the sleek downtown, routing towards the waterfront, but is unable to shake an unnamable feeling. It’s akin to when Grams says her bones hurting means it’s going to rain. Only here, her bones always hurt because it’s always raining. 

It’s like that.

Short of breath, she slows to a stop, throws her arms above her head in a full body stretch, and looks at the sky. The grey clouds don’t look threatening any more than usual, but her gut tells her to seek shelter fast. This time, she listens. Facing her and the bay is a familiar delicatessen. It’s owned and operated by family friends, and she could go for a second cup of coffee. Only when she sees who’s working the counter does she think to disobey her instincts and rush right back out. 

Kai Parker maneuvers the espresso machine with an ease that’s almost enviable, the muscles in his forearm working under his skin. He grew up to take over the family business, but really the family business was simply waiting for his skill and talent to make it something special. Sometimes his siblings cover the storefront for him so he can get work done in the back, inventory, accounting, and the like, but the shop is completely his.

He presents a cappuccino and a blueberry muffin bigger than his fist to the patient customer and gives her his flirtatious albeit empty grin and wink. The young woman blushes, clearly taken by the handsome business owner, and scurries out into the dreary weather. Dazed, she pushes right past Bonnie.

His grin turns wolfish when Bonnie strides up to the pastry display case. Her black fleece leggings and matching jacket fit her body like a second skin. She looks better than every item on the menu put together, good enough to eat, but she’s heard that one before. They’ve lost count how many times he’s said it and how often she’s responded with an exaggerated roll of her candy green eyes.

He chooses to behave today. “Cuban sandwich and a hazelnut latte with oat milk?”

One would assume she orders the same thing every time she comes by, but they’d be wrong. He just has a knack for guessing what she has a taste for exactly. 

“If I didn’t know you, I’d swear you were psychic.”

“I’d think you were right, but _ I know you _ .”

She doesn’t know why the concept of Kai paying such close attention to her makes her knees weak—if Luke did the same thing, she’d chock it up to him being a good friend—but it does. “Maybe I want a caramel latte today.”

“Caramel? When it’s snowing? Nah, the flavors don’t match today. You want hazelnut.”

“Snowing?” 

She glances up from the row of bagels to find thick gusts of white whipping past the outside of the shop. She  _ knew _ but couldn’t pinpoint it exactly, and she hates that about herself. What’s worse is being snowed in with Kai. Even if she attempted to finish her run, she wouldn’t make it to her car before catching her death. 

“The hypothermia isn’t worth it,” he says, echoing her thoughts. Instead of grabbing a to-go cup, he pulls a lavender soup bowl from the shelf and starts to make her drink. “C’mon, my company can’t be that bad.”

“It is,” she sniffs, “but your cooking is to die for, so I’m obviously stuck between a rock and a snowy place.”

The admission warms him up only because he knows it kills her to say it.

Pouting, she settles into a stool at a round high table and begins to peel off her layers. A purple wool scarf, a matching beanie crocheted by her grandmother, and black gloves pile on an empty chair. The shop is toasty warm in spite of the bitter cold, so she pulls off her jacket as well. A tight black turtleneck hugs her middle, her thumbs hooked through holes in the long sleeves. 

Kai surreptitiously watches her, but it’s no secret. The man hasn’t been able to keep his eyes off the woman since they were little kids. The skinny brown girl visiting her grandmother during the summers, getting into fights with his little sister and keeping secrets with his little brother. She always managed to keep Kai at arms’ distance, but that didn’t stop him from finding ways to worm his way closer. 

Then he learned to cook.

After hanging up his apron, he presents the order to Bonnie. She bites back a smirk. On the top of her latte is an image of Jupiter in the foam. “Let me guess: a planet because I’m out of this world?”

He gives her his trademark grin and wink, but there’s a warmth to it reserved only for her. 

The sudden snowfall most likely scared off his brunch crowd, so Kai moves to lock the front door and turns off the neon OPEN sign. He then takes the stool across from Bonnie, props his elbows on the table, and lays his chin in his hands and brazenly watches her eat. As she savors her sandwich because it truly is divine, she ignores his staring before finally giving in. 

“What?”

“Just wondering why you haven’t said yes to Luke’s invite yet.” He swipes a fallen sliced pickle and pops it into his mouth. Knowing she’s thrown by his question, he licks his thumb and forefinger clean while her wide eyes remain on him.

Her long lashes shutter over her eyes when she ducks her head. She sets her sandwich down, fingers sticky with mustard, before reaching for her coffee to clear her throat. “Dinner is one thing, but spending Christmas Day with your family feels...intimate. Like I’m fly on the wall of a sacred ritual or something.”

The corner of his mouth tips up. “Bon, you’re practically family, but if you’re looking to make it official just so you’ll feel better— I can think of a few ways.”

Unenthused at his innuendo, she blinks. “I just haven’t decided yet. Plus, I always do Christmas brunch with Grams.”

“Who was also invited and enthusiastically and immediately accepted, but have it your way,  _ Scrooge _ .” He takes the other half of her sandwich and takes a huge bite out of the overflowing pork slices and melted swiss cheese. It’s his favorite. “If you don’t wanna come over, just say so. We can take it.”

“I know they can, but can you?”

“No, but I’ll keep a brave face.” 

She purses her lips in thought. The Parkers were at the airport with her grandmother to greet her when she moved to Portland. The younger twins were partly to blame for convincing her in the first place, but childhood dynamics shifted over time. She’s no longer the only person who sees Luke’s true self. She and Liv matured from antagonistic tweens to cordial frenemies.

Her and Kai, though… There was always an attraction on ground laid with landmines, but into their teens and adulthood Bonnie found herself refusing to be alone with him. Not that she thought he’d hurt her, but their combined energy felt dangerous and unpredictable. Her intuition would go haywire, but she never could figure out why.

Even now, he makes her feel like a girl not scared of her crush but of the big emotions she could let herself have for them. But she’s not a little girl anymore.

“Fine. If I say I’ll come, will you behave?”

That white toothed grin splits his face in half, and she immediately regrets her wording. “Absolutely not, but that’s what I like to hear.”


	2. Chapter 2

It’s a weird few weeks between Bonnie agreeing to spend Christmas with the Parkers and Christmas Eve. She’s always been close with the five siblings—the younger set of twins were more her speed growing up while the older set were kind of untouchables with poor Joey trailing behind them all—but even she’s confused by their increased interactions. 

Jo calling her as a go between for her mother, wondering what dishes Bonnie wanted for dinner and what size she wears and if she has any known food allergies. Joey texting her pictures of mistletoe and winking emojis while Liv sends her aggressive cat memes depicting the extended amount of time they were about to spend together. Luke stopping by her office and taking her to lunch every other day. 

Nothing worries her more than Kai’s phone calls.

They’re pretty innocuous to start. On his breaks or when the shop is slow, he calls to poke and prod her about what she wants for Christmas. She teases and tells him to use his psychic powers to guess and make it good. He’s up to the challenge but continues to pry hoping to trip her up.

The calls grow in length. A few minutes here becomes thirty minutes there. Joey covers the counter so he can talk to Bonnie on her drives home. She mostly spends her commutes in traffic, which gives him a peek at her filthy, filthy potty mouth and surprising bouts of road rage. Even more worrisome are the times she calls him, often interrupting the paperwork he does at the end of the day. She listens to him suspect one of his vendors of ripping him off and how he brainstorms new dessert items and seasonal drinks for the menu. 

By the time Christmas Eve rolls around, Kai’s contact information shows up in her call log more than anyone else’s. Even as she unpacks her grandmother’s car, her cell vibrates in her back pocket. A lanky teenage boy grabs one of her boxes, so she brings the phone up to her ear. “What?”

“Where are you?”

“Where else? The church. I’m helping Grams set up for dinner.”

“Right. Soup kitchen thing.” There’s a groan on the other end of the line. “You know, Santa or Jesus or Sinterklaas won’t hate you if you ditch.”

“Kai!” she exclaims. A few older women nearby give her disapproving looks. “I’m not skipping out on people in need.”

He breathes through his nose then exhales audibly through his mouth. “I forget. Saint Bonnie is a part of the appeal even when it’s inconveniencing,” he grumbles.

“I’ll take the backhanded compliment,” she quips in an equally moody cadence.

“But you promised…” His tone shifts to a nasally whine.

The image of his bottom lip poking out and grey eyes widening in an obnoxious puppy dog pout comes to mind and, while a cute vision, she knows better than to encourage him.

“I agreed to Christmas Day.”

“Nope. See, the Parkers include Christmas Eve in _ Christmas _. We start cooking and drinking and open one present each before bedtime.” 

She inwardly groans. “Your family is straight out of a Hallmark movie.”

“Not even close, but how about this? I send one of the kids to pick you up because I’m elbow deep in pig carcass—”

“Kai!” a voice reprimands him; his mother more than likely.

“—but when the time comes, I’ll take that fancy elevator upstairs and explain to the big guy how you technically volunteered your time when you already had a prior engagement and that He shouldn’t hold it against you.”

“You’re unbelievable.”

She hangs up but moments later receives a text from Luke saying he’s on his way.

  
Jo gestures wildly to her husband, but he only sputters. “Uh, wheelchair. Walking with a walker? A cane? Uh, uhhhhh…”

“Time!” Joey yells. 

“Skiing!” The raven haired woman throws her hands up in exasperation. “A wheelchair? Really, Ric? How is that winter themed?”

The clueless man shrugs. “Disabilities don’t get holidays off.” His wife, the newly minted doctor, throws him a stern glare. “Dear.” 

The young, married couple is in last place by a huge margin. Liv and Luke usually take the lead, but their twin telepathy is no match for Bonnie and Kai’s freaky psychic link. For a pair who spent most of their lives standoffish and bickering, they went through their rounds with lightning speed. Liv even accused them of cheating, but Bonnie and Kai conspiring? Pigs would sooner fly. 

At this point in the game, it’s almost embarrassing to continue, the youngest Parker decides then announces the unorthodox team as the winners. “Losers get the eggnog.”

Alaric reaches for his twin daughters crawling across the carpet, but Jo shooes him away. “Nuh-uh. _ Loser _ gets the eggnog.” Shamed, the high school history teacher sulks to the kitchen where his in-laws prepare drinks.

An arm thrown over the back of the couch, Kai stretches out his long limbs. Beside him, Bonnie sinks into the well-worn cushions, her crossed legs touching both Kai’s and Luke’s thighs. 

The middle brother sneers. “That shit eating grin is gonna fall right off your smug face when you see the pajamas Mom got all of us.” He leans into Bonnie’s side, bumps her shoulder. “You’ll look adorable, though.”

Taken aback, she shoots both guys a confused look but it goes unnoticed. Luke starts into some banter with Liv who’s restarting her holiday oldies playlist on her phone, and Jo drops a plump blonde baby into Kai’s outstretched lap. “Something to fill up all the space your manspread is taking up.”

“I-I already have an overnight bag with—”

“It’s tradition.” He bounces Lizzie on his knee, the girl watching as her sister gets a wet diaper changed. “It’s our one gift before Christmas morning. Mom buys them but Luke’s the only one who gets to see them beforehand. When you see how ridiculous they are, blame him.”

He rises to his feet and sways over to the ceiling high fraser fir the brothers found and cut down themselves. With Lizzie’s back to his chest, he lets the little girl marvel at the pretty lights and the silver tinsel while “Santa Buddy” comes through a speaker on a side table. Luke cringes, complains about the holiday sanctioned “no homo” rendition, so she quickly changes it to Eartha Kitt’s version. 

Alaric comes around with a tray of eggnog and serves Bonnie first. Her first swig is frothy alcohol and she coughs against the choking burn. “Is this straight bourbon?” She takes another sip before grimacing at the overpowering scent of cinnamon and sets it aside.

“Uh, brandy? Something brown,” he grants her an apologetic smile before moving on. 

“Said the budding alcoholic,” Kai leans down and whispers. Warm air tickles Bonnie’s ear and neck. She turns to watch him pass behind the couch and lift Lizzie up to a sprig of holly hanging from the archway between the living room and the foyer to the front door. Chubby fingers go to grab it, but he brings her back down to cradle her to his chest.

She doesn’t realize she has an audience until Luke elbows her side. “Don’t get any ideas. He’s only good with Lizzie because she’s just like him. Fussy and attention hungry and easily distracted by shiny things.”

“Psh,” Kai’s scoffs. “ I think you mean Liv when she was little.”

“Or, ya know, yesterday,” Joey piles on.

“Hey!” is shouted from one corner while “Don’t talk about my baby like that. She’s a baby!” is protested from the carpet.

“Actually, Josie is much more like Kai,” Joshua interjects, coming into the room with his own mug. Beth Parker follows, her mug with a cinnamon stick garnish, and adds, “Big eyes, very watchful, hardly throws a fit. Unless she doesn’t get her way.”

“Easy fix,” Kai says, handing the baby off to her father. “Give me and itty bitty Josephine what we want and everything’s copacetic.” 

Jo mumbles something sarcastic like “great parenting advice”, but Kai’s too busy to notice the jib. He grabs Bonnie’s hand and yanks her up and into his arms. He intertwines the fingers of his right hand with her left, wraps his left arm around her waist, and pulls her flush against him. Leading, he sways them back and forth to Eartha’s sultry voice. 

With her chin jutted out stubbornly, she matches his rhythm. If he thinks she’ll melt for him just because he’s good with his baby nieces and they share a wacky mental connection, well, he’s not wrong but she’s not _ that _ easy. 

The lilting piano and guitar strumming of the next song starts and Kai’s spins her near the tree. The strings of lights flicker across her cheek, her tawny skin warmed by the multi-colored bulbs. Grey eyes smoldering, he inches them toward the mistletoe, but she’s on to him.

“_ Crazy. I’m crazy for feeling so lonely. I’m crazy - crazy for feeling so blue. _”

“You gotta try harder than that,” she smirks up at him. Pulling out of his embrace leaving them attached at their joined hands, she then spins back in, her back pressing to his front. His family, majorly consumed by their own conversations, ignore them.

His breath ghosts the shell of her ear. “I’m all but on my knees for you, Bonnie.”

A shiver travels up her spine. Malachai Parker genuflect in front of her is an image that comes to mind and she doesn’t hate it. What’s more, she knows he’d love it. If only she gave him a chance.

“_ Worry. Why do I let myself worry? Wondering - what in the world did I do? _”

She twirls back to face him and finds his light eyes darkened with blown out pupils. Her stomach clenches and she can’t tell if it’s her gut or nerves or both. “You promised you’d behave.”

“I would never make a promise I can’t keep.”

A snort chokes her. “You’re such a damn liar.”

“Language. There are children present.” 

He holds her closer, swaying less in time with Patsy Cline’s crooning and more to feel the soft curves of the woman in his hands. She barely clears his shoulder, so she lets her chin rest in the crook of his collar bone. His masculine scent mixed with the smell of pine fill her nose. It’s intoxicating but that could be the eggnog talking.

“Who’s ready for _ pajamas_?”

Sunken into the comfort of his embrace, Bonnie jolts. Before she can pull away, though, he expertly throws her into a low dip. She cries out in unexpected delight attracting the curious eyes of his siblings and parents. 

Burning red in the cheeks, she rights herself then throws a soft punch to his midsection. They move away from each other, Bonnie scooting between the arm of the couch and Luke in an effort to shrink and disappear. Kai nonchalantly throws his legs over the back and plops down, sandwiching in his brother. 

Beth teems with cheer as she begins to pass out the decoratively wrapped shirt boxes. The gold bows are so big Bonnie would feel bad if she didn’t save it. “Let’s start with our guests! Bonnie—oh! I can’t wait to see you in this!—and Ric. My oldest babies Kai and Jo...”

“Hey, where’s my Grams?”

“Oh, Sheila’s coming over in the morning for brunch, honey. Livvie and Luke—uh, Liv, you bring a pair of scissors anywhere near these...”

Bonnie leans back to glower at Kai. “Brunch, huh?”

“Did I forget to mention that?”

“You asshole.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i thought this would be short and sweet (emphasis on short), and now i gotta write part three. i just gotta!


	3. Chapter 3

It’s the eggnog.

Whomever’s heavy handed pouring is to blame for Bonnie’s giddiness. She sips the drink while shedding her clothes. The mix of flavors grow on her until she realizes she doesn’t like eggnog and the bourbon thankfully covers the goopy taste of eggy milk.

She pulls up the long zipper of her fleece onesie and then turns around to face Liv. Green eyes widen until she bursts into deep bellied laughter. Beth Parker, god bless her, bought everyone matching reindeer onesies. Complete with white tummies and “hooves” and hoods.

The blonde glares and fixes one of the the drooping antlers. “Go home, Bon. You’re drunk.”

“And you’re Donner. Or is it Dancer?”

“I’ll Blitzen you if you don’t shut up.”

Bonnie buttons her lips but doesn’t stop her snickering. She moves to the stand up mirror in the corner and takes in her own appearance. Tucking her wavy black hair behind her ears, she admits she looks silly but adorable. Just like Luke said. It’s definitely something she’d only ever wear around her grandmother, but it’s nice to be included in such a simple but tender way. 

Liv only looks ridiculous because she’s so doom and perpetual gloom. A busty Taylor Momsen made to cosplay as Cindy Lou Who once more.

Exuberant laughter sounds from the living room, so Bonnie goes to join the fun. 

Beth and Joshua coo over the sleepy, dressed up babies while Alaric tugs at his crotch, his onesie a size too small. Jo and Luke look thoroughly amused at their family but ambivalent concerning themselves while Joey records the whole group on his phone for snapchat or instagram or something.

The bathroom door to Bonnie’s right opens and out steps Kai. He fills out his onesie well, the sleeves tight around his toned upper arms. He flips on his hood then gives her a wide self-satisfied grin. “Wanna play some reindeer games, Rudy?”

“Why do I have to be Rudolph?”

“Who else would you be?”

Her mouth gaps open lacking a retort, which gives him time to duck and rush her. She’s not a skinny minnie, but he handles her like she’s nothing. By the time she’s upright again, he’s got her up on his shoulders with her legs wrapped around his head. The apex of her thighs is pressed to the back of his neck while his hands on her knees hold her in place. 

She tries not to let her cheeks burn too red. All she can do is brace her hands around the base of the flimsy antlers to give her some kind of leverage.

He trots them into the living room where his family erupts with glee. They laugh and point, throwing jests at Kai while adoring Bonnie’s look. 

High up, she tries to balance where she sits precariously. She’s not often the object of attention and she has a thing about heights. A thing Luke knows all about and Kai… Well, if he knows her so well, he’d catch on to how uncomfortable she is. 

Beth excitedly suggests they take pictures before the girls fall asleep and begins to herd them all together beside the tree. Thinking Kai will let her down, Bonnie shifts her body weight to one side, but strong hands and an opposing shoulder right her. The grip on her knee tightens while the other slides to where her thigh and hip meet. “Kai…”

“I’m not gonna let you fall, Bon,” he argues. “Trust me. I got you.” 

She believes him. She couldn’t be in better hands. Literally. But heights make her feel like she’s not in control and it’s annoying, so she chooses to pout and do something to bother him. She jerks his antlers back and forth. Doing so ruffles his hair under the hood, static gathering. He grits a good-natured warning for her to “behave”.

She claps her palms over his eyes for a moment of blindness before returning to his antlers, making them dance. 

The wire or pipe cleaner or sewn-in plastic might snap if Bonnie doesn’t stop, so he slaps the side of her thigh, his fingers smacking her ass. “Quit it.”

The sting surprises her more than anything, but that doesn’t stop the blush taking over her scandalized face.

“Did you just _ spank _ me?” she says in a low voice. 

The way his shoulders twitch tells her he’s chuckling. She swats his antlers. “Malachai, I will strangle you with this hood.”

“Ugh, will you two please keep your kinks to yourselves?” Liv grimaces as she siddles next to Kai. “I had a big dinner.”

The Bennett’s cheeks burn hot but she blames the alcohol.

Joshua fumbles with an ancient camera. The film won’t advance no matter how many wheels he spins, so Joey finally talks him into using a phone. The patriarch laments the loss of quality going digital, but the youngest son then threatens to post this moment live on his “stream” for all his followers. A chorus shouts for Papa Parker to _ shut it _.

After photos, the family goes to argue over which shots are better and Kai finally swings Bonnie down into a cradle before letting her feet touch the carpet. Before she’s out of this grasp, though, he ducks to whisper. “What was that you said about choking?”

She scoffs and shoves him away, ignoring his devilish grin, and disappears to retrieve her eggnog.

Once both sets of twins turned of age, Beth and Joshua sold their family home and downsized to a bungalow with two bedrooms, an office for Joshua, and a guest room. Still, with the entire brood home for the holidays, they make due. 

Joey grudgingly gives Liv his bed while Jo, Ric, and the girls get the guest room with the added crib for overnight visits. Bonnie is offered the futon in the office, while the brothers get to fight over the sleeper sofa and trundle bed that folds out of the sofa chair. It’s a simple set up.

Until Bonnie’s hiccup.

It’s embarrassing, but her doctor says it’s perfectly normal. Lots of women run hot in their sleep. Night sweats are very common. But a single story house that holds heat very well and fleece pajamas results in Bonnie waking in the middle of the night drenched. 

Strands of hair sticks to her dewy forehead and neck. She doesn’t need to look at the pillow to know there’s a large wet spot. Underneath the blankets and her onesie, sweat droplets freely roll across her skin when she moves to sit upright. 

It’s a disgusting feeling, something she’ll never get used to no matter which brand of birth control they put her on.

She makes to peel off the suffocating layer, but the zipper won’t budge from her collar. It’s stuck on a tuft of fabric or thread but it’s right under her chin and the damned thing will not give. Any other night she’d strip off her damp clothes, scoot to the dry side of the bed, and fall back asleep naked and a little less uncomfortable. That clearly isn’t in the cards for her now.

Toeing through the quiet house, she deliberates. If she wakes up Liv, one of them could end up maimed. Probably both. Jo is completely out of the question. She deals with enough. She decides to bother Luke. He’ll be less of a headache and won’t tease her much.

The Parker brothers three are strewn around the living room. Swaddled in blankets, Joey’s curled in fetal on the trundle bed. Kai and Luke lay heads to feet on the sleeper sofa, a single top sheet between the two. The sheet’s been shoved off Kai’s top half, which is completely bare. He made the obviously smart choice and unzipped his reindeer get up, leaving it bunched at his waist.

For such a boisterous family, the Parkers sleep like logs. 

She creeps closer to see lips move in silent conversation. Whatever her friend is dreaming about must be good because a dopey grin stretches across his unconscious face. She hates to wake him. Still, she shakes his shoulder, her wrist bumping one of Kai’s ankles on accident.

“The story says_ not even a mouse,_ so why are you stirring?”

An eyelid pops open and eyes down his long torso at her folding over the back of the couch. The way his eyebrows bounce, he must’ve expected to see his little sister. 

Bonnie winces.

“I need help.”

He sits up on his elbows, the springs in the thin mattress squealing. “How can I be of assistance?”

“No, not you.”

“You see any other conscious souls around here?”

“You mean you have one?”

He snorts then flops on his back, shutting his eyes. They wait in bated silence until one gives. 

“Fine,” she spits. She turns before seeing a stupid smile splitting his face. He bounds after her into the office. A desk lamp illuminates the otherwise dark house, the futon the site of a fitful sleep. 

Kai looks down and is surprised to see a pair of scissors in her grasp. “I need you to cut me out.”

His face falls into a blank mask, eyes wide as he moves closer. For one, she’s holding the scissors blades out, which is far more dangerous for her if someone were a threat. For two, how could he possibly say no to such a request?

She gathers her hair at her neck and twists the silky strands into a low bun. Then she nods. He watches her face school itself into an image of bravado. It’s enough to keep his trap shut. 

The tips of the blades pinch the material just to the side of the zipper; his mother would kill him if he destroyed the gift. Fabric yields to the sharp metal, so Kai lets his gaze flicker back and forth from his work to the nervous eyes on him.

He gets to the dip of her cleavage to find she’s not wearing a bra underneath. He says nothing, only waits for her to give him the okay to keep cutting. The scissors get to her navel which seems good enough, so he steps back. Metal grazes the flesh of his inner wrist just enough that he knows he’s not dreaming.

Bonnie bunches the slit material and holds it closed to her chest. “I, uh, I have other sleep clothes, but I really need to take a shower.”

“...That’s not an invitation, is it?”

She rolls her eyes, not in the mood. “A towel. Please?”

He’s gone and back in short moments, having moved through the house without a sound. The towel changes hands and she holds it like a shield. “If I admit this to you, you can’t make fun or tease or tell.”

“I’m an arsenal of secrets.” His arms cross his broad chest then he nods for her to go on.

“I sweat. In my sleep. It’s just a thing. So I feel really gross and moist in the worst way right now. I’m gonna shower then I’ll probably stay up and wash what’s left of this really nice gift and the sheets. 

“If you could just...go back to sleep and act like this was a really weird dream you’d dissect with your therapist, that’d be great.”

“Bon—” 

She scoots out the doorway leaving him in the quiet room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> four parts. four parts MAX. *glares at muse*


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rating moved up to E. you know why... ;)

Her sheets are missing. Just like her ruined onesie she’d left on the floor in the bathroom. A clean, dry pair of sheets hug the thick mattress of the futon. It’s thoughtful...and embarrassing. Bonnie’s not one to be taken care of. She’s the caretaker.

She finds him in the kitchen. Leaning against the sink, he’s twisted at the waist to watch the falling snow outside the window. There’s a mug in his hands and another on the kitchen island, steaming rising above the rim. “Tea?”

“You’re still up.”

“Laundry,” he says simply. 

He takes in her pilling grey thermal shirt and cotton shorts. His knuckle taps the side of the mug warming his hands. “You might want to hydrate. After all that eggnog flavored bourbon, I mean.”

“Thanks.” She sips it, hums her approval. “And, uh, thanks for being nice about earlier.”

He squints. “You know I’m not a total prick.”

“Just three quarters of one.”

“Never had complaints.” He winks.

The innuendo induces yet another eye roll. She mutters a parting “g’night” but pauses in her exit when he softly calls her name. 

Kai steps towards her and stops. His eyes watch her expression while his finger points up. She glances at the top of the ceiling, the mistletoe having been moved from its original spot near the front door.

She scoffs, sets down her mug. “Really?”

“This is me behaving, but if you’re going to disobey convention then you’re more of a grinch than I pegged you for.”

Stomach flipping, she looks away with a lick of her lips. “I admitted one of the weirdest, worst things about myself and you’re still thinking about kissing me?”

“You think a little sweat is the worst thing?” He snorts. “Luke has a spastic colon and I was sleeping downwind of him.

“Besides, what about your martyr complex? Or how my brother and sister were ready to road-trip and kidnap you to get your away from those shitty, toxic friends? Or the fact that you have an incredible sense of self-discipline? That’s literally your most dangerous quality.”

“How’s that?” she wonders, taken aback by such a keen although harsh observation. Her cheeks burn red.

“You keep putting us off and it’ll be to your own detriment.”

“Maybe I’m sparing the both of us.”

His brow furrows and looks over her shoulder for a long minute. He blinks. “Yeah, sorry. Does not compute.” 

Hands go to her hips and he ducks, their foreheads touching. The scent of peppermint fills her nose. 

“Maybe,” she breathes, “I’m scared of drowning in..._ this_.”

“You wouldn’t be alone in the undertow. Plus, weren’t you a lifeguard? Out of the two of us, I think you’ll be just fine.”

The way he smells combined with the heat of his body and the way he recalls a decade old fact about her in an instant override her hesitation. She springs up on the balls of her feet and presses her lips to his. Strong arms encircle her waist and pull her close. 

They move together, fingers gripping and exploring, breath shallow and temperatures rising. She’s hefted up by the backs of her thighs and carried over to the island. All their teasing and orbiting hadn’t quite prepared her for the freefall, the relief of touching like this.

He breaks away first, peppering kisses down her neck. Fingers venture under her top, over her taut stomach, and graze her breasts. That wakes her up. 

“Kai, your family...”

“Wouldn’t want to end up on pornhub by accident,” he muses in a deep voice that makes her stomach knot. His teenage baby brother really loves documenting life around him. 

Pressing a firm kiss to her jaw, he lifts her off the counter and carries her down the hallway. Legs and arms wrapped around him, she buries her face in his neck as if she never wants to let go. 

The office is at the end of the house, so if they make noise it won’t immediately wake anyone. Still, Kai kicks the door closed behind them then sits on the futon with Bonnie straddling his lap. 

Small hands move to his chest and push him until he’s flat on his back. The woman on top goes to work feeling out the whole of his muscled form in the low light. Fingers undo the knotted sleeves of his onesie. He bites against a moan.

Bonnie may have self-discipline, but she’s also impatient when she’s decided she wants something. She captures Kai’s mouth and shoves off her shorts and panties while he shuffles off his ridiculous pajamas. 

If it’s years in the making, neither waste a second marveling at the other fearing the long gestating fantasy will evaporate.

When he fills her up, for the first time in years the butterflies in her stomach finally settle. There’s grinding and kissing, nipping and squeezing. Two people moving together in the dark, quiet hours of the morning. When it’s over, he holds her in an unyielding embrace and she clings to him.

Morning brightens the room, sun rays warming bare, sienna skin. A hand instinctively reaches out only to find rumpled, empty sheets. Frowning, Bonnie lifts her head from the pillow. 

“Looking for something?” She rotates then groans at the sight of his teasing smirk. Clothed and cheerful, he sits perched at the edge of the futon.

“Mm, coffee if you got it.”

She flips over, snuggling deeper under the sheets. She’s still naked and her body aches in a sweet way that makes her want to remain in bed and savor it.

A mug materializes and she’s quick to grab it, sits up and covers her chest with sheets. He also hands her a small, wrapped box with a red bow. “And your gift.”

A box that small could only be one thing. Jade eyes stare at it warily. “I didn’t expect jewelry.”

He gives no preamble or explanation. Just watches her take it, peel the wrapping paper off, and uncover the black velvet ring box.

“Kai…”

“Just open it.”

She does so with trembling fingers. It’s a thin, delicate gold band. There’s a tiny design worn down from use. Something floral, very vintage. 

“They’re orange blossoms. It belonged to my dad’s mom. You can apparently fetch a real good price for it on etsy.”

“Kai…”

“It’s an anchor.”

She frowns. 

A heavy breath accompanies his serious face. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ve wanted you for forever and that’s not changing. I’m always going to be right here, Bon. But you said you’re scared of drowning, so…”

“An anchor,” she finishes. The rush of emotions overwhelms her to the point that she turns her face away and covers her mouth. When she faces him, concern and anticipation await her. “This is really very sweet. But I-I can’t.”

His expression remains but she sees his eyes empty. “_It’s your grandmother’s ring_!” she rushes to amend. 

He shrugs. “She’s not using it anymore.”

All she can do is chuckle at the dark remark, gaze going back to the ring. 

She sets the box in her lap and unbuckles the gold necklace around her neck. From it dangles a small pineapple charm from a trip with her Grams to St. Thomas a few summers back. Trying not to blanch at the 14k stamp, she threads the chain through. Kai moves to snap her necklace in place. Her hand covers the ring and charm against her chest while his knuckles linger on the back of her neck.

“This wasn’t a proposal, was it?”

He laughs loudly. “You know I have to outdo Ric’s cheesy, shotgun wedding ass, mariachi band proposal. I’m thinking...a gondola filled with roses.”

She opens his mouth, but he catches himself. “Sunflowers.”

A blush warms her cheeks. “It doesn’t have to be a gondola.”

_ February _

It’s been snowing steadily but Kai can’t close the shop. The foot traffic has been heavier than normal and he even called in Joey and Liv to help, promising time and a half for working the holiday. 

It’s Valentine’s day after all. 

Bonnie sits at her usual table, laptop open in front of her as she furiously types away. She’s “working from home”, remotely editing buggy coding for a client. Joey replaces her empty mug with a full one and she rewards him with a kiss on the cheek. Her red lipstick leaves a faint imprint that he’ll wear with pride for the rest of the shift. 

At first, she thought to work with headphones over her braid crown, but customers tend to flirt with Kai and she can’t blame them. If anything, she finds it amusing because he is clearly uninterested beyond surface level customer service, but she likes to watch them try. 

Occasionally, she makes a remark about an embarrassing habit the owner has (“_Don’t do it, girl. He eats his fingernails. Yeah, doesn’t just bite and spit them out. Eats them. Like it’s extra protein or something_.”) just to watch some woman grimace and hurry out. Kai has to remind her he does need repeat business to make a living, but he doesn’t complain too much. 

She wore his ring on her right hand, which is a shorter journey to her left than from her necklace. He’s thrilled.

It’s true, dating Kai Parker isn’t easy. He’s brutally honest, sometimes to the point of cruelty. He’s determined, bulldozing his obstacles who are often people. He is confrontational and possessive, seeing things and people like they have inherent value but only in however they can benefit him. He’s not particularly jealous. No, he’s quite secure even when Bonnie is not.

On the other hand, Bonnie is extremely stubborn, often digging her heels in even when she’s wrong and knows it. She’s impulsive when she isn’t procrastinating. There are times when she gets so preoccupied with her job, she blanks on dates and dinners. Shortens days in bed with Kai to work off the clock. 

Really, her night sweats don’t even make the list of worst things about her. 

It doesn’t take long before they have their first real drag out fight as a couple. The friction had been mounting, especially with the holiday season coming to a close and Bonnie being promoted to project manager with her tech firm after the new year. They saw each other less and less, and Kai felt her distance when they were together. He didn’t issue an ultimatum, but it felt like one. 

“I wanna be the guy you always come home to, but I won’t be the one sitting at a table with two full plates across from an empty chair anymore.”

They didn’t talk for a week after that.

Talking it over with her Grams, she wondered if Kai is who she wanted. When it’s good, it’s heavenly, but they seemed to butt heads more than not. Did she accidentally take on too much?

Sheila Bennett gave sage advice like no one else could. “_Bonnie, you can swim just fine. Hell, you tend to stay underwater longer than most anyone would or should, but you always resurface. As long as you’re not the thing he pins between him and the ocean floor, I think you should worry more about you than that boy_.”

When he picked her up from work on her birthday a few days later, the ring had migrated. Neither brought it up at dinner, but the emotional barrier between them seemed to have thinned after that.

There’s a short break in customers and Kai collapses on a stool across the table. “I’m closing the shop tomorrow.”

“And miss the traffic for half priced treats?” Joey exclaims, dusting powered sugar off his apron.

“You wanna take the cracked sugar cookies home tonight, be my guest.” He glances up at his girlfriend. Her fingers tap away, but she can’t hide the smirk on her face. “Matter of fact, you two clock out. I’ve got this for another hour or so.”

“You’re closing early?” Liv chimes in. 

“Don’t you have some chick you’re trying to see?”

“I’m not complaining. I’m just making sure you heard the words out of your own mouth, boss man.” She crumples her apron and tosses it on the counter. “I still expect holiday pay for the _ full _ shift,” she announces before disappearing into the back for her belongings. Joey is quick on her heels begging to be dropped off on her way. Once they leave, the shop is finally quiet.

“It wasn’t supposed to be this busy,” he grumbles, forehead falling on his crossed arms.

“You only have yourself to blame,” Bonnie says. “You’re the one who made all the V-day pastries.”

“_Excuse _ me. I’ll make sure to change it from Salted to _ Salty _ Caramel Bon Bons after today.”

She closes her laptop and folds her hands together. “If you close up now, we can make it across town before the snow gets really bad.”

He groans. “I’ve got two pick-up orders coming in an hour.” 

“Then turn on the closed sign and let me cheer you up while we wait.”

His eyebrow arches. She steps away from her table and disappears down the short hallway to the back. 

He does as he’s told then follows. Entering his office, he finds her idly spinning in his chair. He perches on the corner of the desk, one leg braced against the floor. “Let me guess: you got me a pony. Oh, Bon, you shouldn’t have.”

She stands and nears him. Between his legs, she pushes the tip of her finger to his chest. “Even better.”

“Two ponies?”

That finger trails down the front of his shirt to where it’s tucked in the front of his jeans. She holds his gaze while she single-handedly undoes the front of his pants. She cups him through his boxers before slipping under its waistband. He stiffens under her touch, so she makes a show of licking her palm before returning her hand.

Kai blows out a shaky breath. “Okay, this is my last guess. Three ponies?”

She smiles as she begins to stroke him. His hands brace themselves on the desk behind him once she catches a rhythm. She’ll admit she likes to watch. He rarely loses his calm or his sense of control - or the illusion of it. Only when they’re intimate like this does his mask lift. Eyelids shutter closed, mouth drops open, and breath grows shallow. She tightens her grip and he lets out groans of pleasure. 

Never one to forget when Bonnie’s in the room, he opens his heavy lidded eyes and pulls her in by the neck for a deep kiss. Her lips part and he plunges his tongue between them, tastes the flavor of her coffee order: Mocha with candied cherry toppings.

Her hand movements grow in speed, their kisses more fervent when Kai notices something missing. He pulls back, his hand still clutching the side of her neck. “Where is it?”

“What?” 

He ducks his hand and peers into his boxers. Her hand is firmly wrapped around his cock, her fingers bare. “The ring.”

She frowns. “You’re thinking about your _ grandmother’s _ ring during a handjob?”

“You took it off.” His voice is quieter than he intends, softer than she expects.

Annoyance shifts to resignation before she pulls her hand from his pants. With a sigh, she holds up the other, her left hand. The ring fits snug on her third finger. “A guy at work kept bugging me about having a Valentine, so I switched it. Fits better here anyway.”

His chest swells (along with his dick), but she cuts him off before he can get too excited. “Nothing’s changed, Kai.”

A grin stretches his face, his eyes growing warmer by the second. “Nothing changes,” he agrees. He hops off the desk and with a burst of energy, picks her up and sets her where he sat.

“No, your mind’s already racing. I mean it,” she argues between the kisses he plies her with. 

“Mhm, I hear you.” Greedy hands pull down the tights and panties under her red sweater dress.

She lays back on the desk, swatting at a pendulum she almost crushes. “Ugh, I give you an inch and you always take a damn marathon,” she grumbles. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He kneels before her and presses his lips to her inner thigh, inches closer. He drapes her legs over his shoulders. 

She trembles under his feather light kisses. Defeated, she lets her head fall back. “Do you even know how to behave like a normal person?”

Ignoring her, he laves her core with a lick that sends a shudder through her. 

Then he pops his head up. “It was sunflowers, right?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two holidays for the price of one! what can i say? seeing my bad baby boi again brings inspiration out of me. :3


End file.
